WHATEVER HELPS ME SLEEP AT NIGHT*:

I bit into a springroll the other day and fully cracked a filling on a piece of gravel. At first I was grossed out, 'cause gravel shouldn't be in a spring roll. Eventually I remembered that there was probably about 40 tons of gravel in my immediate neighborhood that had been dumped by the City in their futile attempt to keep the roads open during our recent snowstorm.

Sidebar: My fellow Portlanders, seriously, buy a friggin' clue. It's just 6 inches of snow, not the goddam Rapture. It's not that big a deal.

Anyways, I've decided to go with "the tons of gravel from the roads got into my springroll" instead of the more unsavory "The gravel stuck to the dead cat got in my springroll".

*Other than my usual routine of huffing a half pint of ether

- posted by Aaron @ 3:56 PM