THIS BIBLE'S FOR THUMPIN':

MY GET OUT OF JAIL FREE CARD

As was explained to me in great detail by a man wearing a sandwich board consigning Feminists and "longhairs" to the firey pit, I am going straight to hell.

He obviously didn't know who he was dealing with however, because as an ordained minister, I have been bequeathed by the Universal Life Church of the Internet (actual location: Modesto, CA) with the awesome power to perform marriages in three western states. Not to mention the fact that I have been recently granted the power to forgive sin by almighty G-d and the bishop/guy who's got the mailing list. I even get me a classy monthly newsletter.

In your face sandwich-board-wearing-bible-guy.
- posted by Aaron @ 7:55 AM